PENELOPE CRUZ –« I CAN BE MY OWN WORST ENEMY!»
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by Harold von Kursk
LOS ANGELES – It’s hard not to be swept up by the staggering beauty of Penelope Cruz. After all, this is a supremely gifted actress who is blessed with perfect features, a lithe figure, and tremendous passion about her life and work. She’s a woman who is able to harness her emotions at will and her most recent film, «Vicky Cristina Barcelona,” directed by Woody Allen, earned her a coveted Best Supporting Actress Oscar nomination, her second, following her 2006 nomination for Pedro Almodovar’s “Volver.” Typical of a Woody Allen film, VCB is amongst other things a study in dysfunctional relationships, especially the ménage-a-trois that develops between the fiery Maria Elena (Cruz), her philandering artist lover Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem, Cruz’s real-life boyfriend), and Cristina, an American tourist played by Scarlett Johansson.
Ironically, Cruz herself is very much a student of relationships:
"We often sabotage ourselves especially when it comes to relationships and how we treat other people and people we love. We are constantly blocking ourselves and putting up obstacles where none really exist. I can often be my own worst enemy."
"For me, this is a very fasincating and personal subject...I have always felt that I have a natural instinct when it comes to ruining things and causing problems with friends. I often destroy my own happiness and I have struggled with this problem all my life. »
Adds Cruz: « I feel I am getting better at becoming aware of when this happens to me, and so I can prevent it, but I still have to watch myself and stop myself from falling into that trap."
In the meantime, Penelope Cruz is planning to take some time off for herself. She has recently been shooting some remaining dance numbers on “Nine,” the film version of the fabled Broadway musical, and after that is looking forward to serious relaxation.
“I want to take some time off this year and rest a little bit, unpack boxes, and do things that I haven’t been able to do in many years,” explains Cruz.
“I need to be able to live. In the past, I’ve gone from set to set to set, doing sometimes as many as four movies in one year. I don’t regret that, because I love working. But right now I feel like I could not do that and I want some more time for myself and my friends.”
The 34-year-old Cruz is arguably doing the best work of her career these days, and her scenes with Bardem in VCB are vibrant, volcanic, and charged with erotic intensity. She rivets our attention as much with her smoldering intensity as with her sensual gaze. Her performance in last year’s “Elegy” also showed that her work is taking on an added gravitas and that she has become completely comfortable acting in English as opposed to her native Spanish.
In the interview that follows, Penelope Cruz reveals herself to be a deeply reflective and sensitive young woman who has struggled to ovecome the kind of self-doubt and insecurity that issue from her perfectionist ambitions.
(NOTE: This interview took place prior to Cruz's winning the Best Supporting Actress Oscar - her first Oscar win. We congratulate the beautiful Penelope Cruz who was visibly moved during her acceptance speech, thanking, amongst others, Pedro Almodovar, who gave her some of her best roles in films like All About My Mother and Volver. Cruz will soon be seen in the new Almodovar film, Broken Embraces, scheduled to be released later this year.)
THE INTERVIEW
Q: Penelope, how do you feel about your Oscar nomination for your performance as Maria Elena in Vicky Cristina Barcelona?
CRUZ: I am very excited and very grateful. I loved playing Maria Elena although I hope I’m not to similar to her! And I didn’t ever want to think, ‘Oh, I’m playing a crazy person.’ Because, I mean, who’s normal. I don’t know anybody that is normal.
Q: Why is Maria Elena so tormented and volatile?
CRUZ: Maria Elena thinks she will not be as creative if she's not torturing herself, and she can't get out of that pattern. When I was working on the film I felt like I was doing the most serious drama that I had done in my career.
When I first saw the film (at its world premiere last summer) in Cannes, I wondered to myself, 'Why is the audience laughing?'
I understood that the film was a romantic comedy when I read the script. But in preparing for the film and then playing her for those few weeks, I forgot about that because she suffers so much and I was suffering with her. Maria Elena is a woman in a lot of pain, and I did not want to laugh at that pain.
Now though, every time I see the movie, I laugh and relax and see the movie from the point of view of the audience.
Q: Was the emotional intensity between your character, Maria Elena, and Javier Bardem's Juan Antonio, at all frightening?
CRUZ: When you look at couples, it’s frightening to think how easily we can ruin or complicate relationships by our own fears and stubbornness and lack of sensitivity at times. We are capable of creating problems out of nothing where there shoudn't be any or where they don't exist, only in our neuroses! (Laughs)
Q: What would Woody Allen say to you in terms of your performance as Maria Elena?
CRUZ: Maria Elena is full of love and hate and many conflicting emotions. She loses her temper easily and yells very loudly...I kept asking Woody if she has to scream so loudly. And he would tell me, 'Believe me, these women do exist!'
So I played my character with lots of anger and anguish and I think the result justifies the way Woody wanted me to play Maria Elena. Much of the humour and drama of the film comes from the chaos she provokes.
Q : How does Woody Allen differ from frequent Spanish director, Pedro Almodovar ?
CRUZ : They couldn’ t be more opposite in their approach to directing. Pedro likes to refine every aspect of a scene and will keep redoing a scene until he feels it’s perfect. Woody doesn’t rehearse scenes and he likes to do everything in one or two takes. Of course, when you work like that, you’re forced to try to get the scene right the first time and you don’t have room for error.
Woody also leaves a lot of room for spontaneity. He allows you as an actor a lot of freedom to interpret the role as you wish and doesn’t like to tell you how to play a scene. That’s very unusual amongst directors but also very liberating and frightening for an actor !
Q : What was it like working with Woody Allen ?
CRUZ : He was very nice, very funny, but there is no bullshit with Woody. He's very direct and honest and sometimes you cannot believe your ears. There's no social veneer. It's a very New York thing, but he has that more (of that directness) than anybody I know, and I really respect and appreciate that. He doesn't waste energy.
Q : Woody Allen is famous for doing only a few takes which sometimes proves troubling to actors. Did you ask for more takes ?
CRUZ : (Very animated) Every single time ! I drove him crazy with that ! The last day of shooting I think he ran out of patience with me because he was so sweet and so kind and he always said yes to my wanting to do one more take. But on the last scene on the last day of shooting, I was very nervous and I kept asking for another take. I kept saying, « Please, one more time ? » But at one point Woody disappeared. I was looking for him and he was hiding on the set from me !
But Woody isn’t the only director I’ve asked for more takes. I’ve always done this on film sets. If I don’t do another take, I torture myself for the rest of the day. And then I remember everything, from every take, from every scene. [it's] the insecurity of the actor and what happens when you relax after the take, then always you come up with something that you couldn't see when you were tense because you were in the middle of it.
I guess I’m looking for perfection, although I don’t think that’s good for my health or for my work. It’s always been like that for me !
Q: You’ve also said you are often tormented when you first go on the set.
CRUZ: I feel every time I'm making a movie, it as if it was my first film. Every time I have the same fear that I'm gonna be fired. And I'm not joking. Every movie, the first week, I always feel that they could fire me.
Q: Why do you still have these self-doubts after having accomplished so much during your career?
CRUZ: It's my nature. I have always been very hard on myself and I am constantly trying to be better and not being satisfied with where I am at any particular point in my life. I have spent a long time trying to overcome this so that I can take happiness in the moment and not worry so much. So I am really trying to be more open and relaxed not just with myself but in terms of how I interact with my friends.
Q: Are you as driven as ever when it comes to your work?
CRUZ: I can be. I can become very emotional and intense in preparing for a role or during a film when there are difficult scenes to play. Some roles are very scary and that's why acting is risky because you have to be willing to throw yourself into difficult situations emotionally.
I have often called my mother in the middle of the night when I've been very worried about certain scenes. But then I manage to calm down as the shooting is about to take place and everything falls into place. I just wish I could manage not to feel so much stress sometimes.
Q: Would you like to set the record straight on whether you're in love with Javier Bardem?
CRUZ: He's an amazing and wonderful actor, but I never talk about my personal life. I feel that it's my right to save that for myself and it's my responsibility to do it.
It's always a trap to share your secrets. I did that when I first got attention as a teenager acting in Spain. I would get so upset because I would talk about a movie for two hours and then all I read about was something personal that I talked about. I don’t believe that being an actress and being a celebrity means that you have an obligation to talk about your private lifre. I feel that the public in general knows too much about actors today. It detracts from the ability of audiences to appreciate your playing a character on the screen.
Q: Have you given thought to settling down and having children?
CRUZ : I want to have babies one day but not right now. I've loved playing a mother on the screen, but I feel I have plenty of time in my own life. But for sure I want to be a mother. I have a tendency to become a mother of everyone around me. My family, my brother, my sister, they're always complaining that I'm too protective and I've always been like that. But I don't know if I believe in marriage. I believe in family, in love, in children.
I also feel that I need to work hard over the coming years because there are so many different kinds of films and roles I would like to play before I take time off for children.
Even with a baby, I could never see myself putting my career completely on hold. It would not be fair to me, my husband, or my children. That's how much I love acting. I need that to be happy and I feel I can manage both family and work like so many other women do. I want to be a working mother like my own mother was.
Q: You've often said that your mother is your greatest inspiration. Can you explain that?
CRUZ: Yes. I always admired my mother's ability to work six days a week (as a hairstylist - ED) and still make breakfast, lunch and dinner for us. She was always tireless and selfless when it came to her children and she had no help and still she never complained. She felt it was her responsibility. I want to be the same way with my children.
Q: Do your parents understand the way you live?
CRUZ: Yes. They think the rhythm of my life is completely nuts. I think they even worry a little bit but then they see that I don’t party, I don’t drink, I don’t go out of night. Every hour I have of free time, I have a little bit of rest and a little bit of silence and quiet time.
Q: What was it like growing up with your family in Madrid?
CRUZ: It was full of life. We were all artists in a very Bohemian way. We would be cleaning the house on Sundays while listening to opera. We would listen to Bizet or Prokofiev and then watch Italian movies at night. Even though we didn't have much money, we were one of the first families in our neighborhood to have a video machine, and so we rented lots of movies and I grew up watching a lot of great Italian movies from directors like Fellini, Rosselini, and De Sica. Anna Magnani was one of my favourite actresses.
Q: Did you always dream of becoming an actress?
CRUZ: I had incredible dreams. I began dancing when I was four and so I went to bed dreaming every night about what kind of an artist I might become one day. I loved dancing and I also loved the idea of becoming an actress. I honestly believe that those kinds of dreams and hopes helped push me to succeed. And I keep dreaming about the future and where it's all going to take me.
Q: You're often stated that you love to work hard. Where do you get that drive and discipline from?
CRUZ: It comes from both my family and from my training as a ballet dancer. Doing ballet is probably one of the hardest forms of physical training you can ever experience.
It's also very tough mentally because you have to learn to endure lots of pain and dancing with your feet blistered and bleeding all the time. But I still remember this incredible power and high I would get from the feeling that I had conquered my pain and pushed myself further than I thought I could go. It's hard to explain.
Dancing also gave me a sense of responsibility and commitment. You can't do it half-way. It's all or nothing, and I still feel that sense of commitment in my work as an actress and that's been a big help to me in my career.
Q : You started out as a ballerina when your were young. Do you still take ballet classes ?
CRUZ.: I don't do it unless I have a reason. Now I’m doing a big musical (« Nine » with Daniel Day-Lewis, Nicole Kidman and Sophia Loren – ED) – and I’ve been dancing five, six hours a day. Finally I’ve been able to fully train and dance with a movie. I'm really excited about it.
Q: You’ve said you are planning to take some time off. Do you feel less stressed these days?
CRUZ: It takes discipline for me to stop worrying in general. I used to be a workaholic but now I am more balanced. So I have to fight against my natural impulses…I'm still driven, or more, but now I feel much freer when it comes to everyday life and appreciating the balance between the time for work and the time for yourself. You have to live.
Q: What do you do to relax?
CRUZ: I like going to the beach, walking, reading, looking at people and how they move and speak. I love studying people and how they behave towards each other. Human beings are the most complex subject you can ever find.
Q :Does this fascination with human behaviour fuel your work as an actress ?
CRUZ : Of course ! Emotions are so turbulent and difficult to grasp. We are all struggling to master ourselves and find some meaning to our lives and our actions. Searching for that understanding and trying to feel more at peace with everything in the world is a big part of what I am seeking.
Q: Where do you live these days?
CRUZ: Madrid is always my main home because my family is here and I have a house here. I’ve spent several months in Madrid this past year because I was shooting a new film with Pedro (Almodovar). Madrid is my base and I feel it’s important for me to keep working in Spanish and in my native country. I also spend a lot of time in Los Angeles. I have a home there, too. But New York is the city I love the most in America.
Q: How do you feel about having spent more than half your life in front of the cameras?
CRUZ: Sometimes I get sad thinking about my past and wondering why I did this or went in one direction and not another. But I fight those kinds of impulses because nostalgia is a very negative emotion and it doesn't really help move you forward in life. I think you need to live in the present, learn as much as you can, and enjoy your life and your experiences with friends. Every day has importance and the little things as much as working on interesting films. I don't try to live in terms of big moments or stages. I try to advance day by day.
Q: What have you learned over the course of your life in the public eye?
CRUZ: I've learned to focus on my life and my friends and not worry about what's being written about me. My life has nothing to do with that and I've reached a point where I feel more free and not burdened by trying to defend myself against lies that are printed.
That's just a waste of my time. I always try to distance myself from that. You just have to live your life the best you can and be a good person with the people around you.
There's no point in thinking about the past. I've much to look forward to. I want to travel and learn. I feel I can go anywhere and do anything. My family always told me to embrace life, and that is what I am doing.
Q: How do you feel these days?
CRUZ: I feel very good. I am enjoying the freedom that comes with having a job that I love and which allows me to be very creative. I don't think one can ask for much more in life.
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